


Diet Coke Turnabout

by FallzVentus



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Diet Coke, Phoenix Wright Style court, Ryan's twitch community - Freeform, madhouse, trail
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-08-10 02:56:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7827646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallzVentus/pseuds/FallzVentus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fallz is trying to beat Phoenix Wright without cheating, but this argument over the last diet coke is driving her insane. Time to get to the bottom of this. Court room style!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Diet Coke Turnabout

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when it's early in the morning, I've barely had any sleep, and inspiration comes from watching at top 10 list about phoenix wright cases. Enjoy the randomness. Takes place in MadDramaQueen's MadHouse AU. Edit: Misrepresented Omega so I did some editing. Sorry about that DX.

Fallz was busy trying to figure out a puzzle in Phoenix Wright like any normal person with a DS would. It was one of her favorite visual novel games and this had to be the fifth time she played it. However, this would be her first time playing without cheating. She got in an argument with Omega that she could play the game without cheating and she was going to prove that she could. She was about to figure out the answer, until she heard sudden yelling. 

“What the hell?” she said as she closed her DS. The yelling seemed to be coming from the game room because what normal house didn’t have a game room. Inside were Ryan, Lotti, Jess, and King arguing over something. The closer she got, the more slightly annoyed she became. 

“Guys!” she yelled gaining their attention, “What the hell is going on? I lost concentration because of all the yelling.” Lotti pouted.

“King and Jess are trying to say that I drank the last diet coke and I didn’t!” she said. 

“Who else loves Diet Coke as much as Ryan but you,” King said. 

“Just admit you drank it.”

“But I didn’t it!” 

“I saw you with a diet coke can earlier. It had to be you!” Jess said holding her katana. 

“Guys!” Fallz yelled again. They looked to her again. “Since you all can’t seem to come to an agreement, and won’t stop yelling about it, I suggest we hold a trial.” 

“A trial? Fallz, I don’t think that’s necessary,” Ryan said. 

“You all distracted me from Phoenix Wright, so we’re holding a trial. I will defend Lotti and try to prove her innocence and investigate the scene of the crime. Until then, Lotti will be confined in her room.” 

“Hey!” she said. 

“Sorry Lotti, that’s how court works. It won’t be for long I swear. I’ll be there in a bit. Jess, I’m gonna need your witness statement and for you to take the stand during the trial.” 

“What about me?” King asked. Fallz hummed 

“King you can be the bailiff.” 

“Can I have a weapon as a bailiff?”

“Yes you can have a weapon. Ryan, you’re judge. Trial will be at 2.” 

“Silly Fallz, you’re forgetting the most important part of a trial,” a voice said behind her. She looked up to see Omega with that usual mischievous smirk of his. 

“I’m pretty sure I covered everything Omega.” 

“But what is a trial without the prosecution. I for one do think Lotti is guilty. Her love of diet coke rivals that of Ryan’s and the two are known for fighting over the last can. Lotti obviously took it in order to prove a point to Ryan.” 

“The trial hasn’t started yet. How about you gather some actual evidence before you make a claim like that. I’ll see you in court.” Omega laughed. 

“You can’t cheat your way out of this one. Good luck proving Lotti’s innocence.” Fallz glared as Omega walked away. Oh it was on now. She could do this without cheating! 

Lotti grumbled as she headed off to her room and King followed her to make sure she stayed there. Ryan just sighed. 

“I don’t see the point in all of this but I’ll play along. Might as well buy some more diet coke while I wait for this trial to go on.” 

“K,” Fallz said as the Mad King left. She sighed. All she wanted to do was play Phoenix Wright. Was that so wrong? She jumped when she heard Jess clear her throat. She turned around to see the weapon happy Vagabond polishing her blade. 

“So, you need my statement right?” she asked. 

“Y-Yeah.... What exactly did you see?” 

“Lotti was in the hallway walking to her room and I saw her drinking a can of diet coke. The kitchen is the only place to get a diet coke so...she must have taken the last one. I don’t know why she just won’t admit it.” Fallz nodded. 

“What time was it when you saw her?” Jess shrugged. 

“I don’t know. Around...11:30 maybe. That’s usually when I perform maintenance on the weapons. That chainsaw isn’t going to take care of itself. They need to be ready for the next Dead by Daylight game night.” Jess suddenly had a happy gleam in her eye causing Fallz to back away slowly. She was lucky she was away for that night. She’s scared to think what Jess is like as a killer. 

“Okay, so I’ll see you at the trial...” she said and quickly left the future murder alone. She needed to check out the crime scene anyway. She headed towards the kitchen only to see Omega walking out of it. He had this all knowing look on his face and Fallz only stuck her tongue at him while she walked in herself. King was there guarding the fridge. 

“King, I thought you were guarding Lotti’s room.” 

"I was but I was promised a new set of knives.”

“What?! But I need to do my investigation too.” 

“Sorry, but I was promised to get me a new set of knives if I did this..... Unless you have something better?” Fallz groaned. She was going to regret this. 

“There’s a new battle axe with your name on it if you let me do my investigation.” 

“I don’t know...” 

“It’s bigger than Jess’s.” 

“Now you’re talkin my language. I want it before the trial. Have fun investigating,” he said and left the kitchen. Fallz faced palmed. She was saving that axe for Ryan, but she guessed she could always get him something else. The man probably had loads of axes already. She sighed and opened the fridge. Indeed, there stood the last can of Diet coke. When Fallz picked it up, it was empty (no shit), but why would someone put an empty can back in the fridge? She started to examine the can closely and noticed some pink glitter on its surface. What the hell? How did-

“What are you doing?” Cheryl asked scaring the crap out of Fallz. 

“Don’t do that. I’m investigating the Diet Coke case. I’m going to prove Lotti's innocent.” Cheryl nodded. 

“That’s great. Anything I can do to help?” 

“Well, did you see Lotti in the kitchen before 11:30?” 

“Um, no. I was in here getting some oreos for me and Ray at around 11:15 and I left around 11:28 because I got trapped in a conversation with Tabi.” 

“Okay...That can be very helpful. Do you mind taking the stand later in the trial?” 

“Anything to help Lotti, but can Ray go up with me?” 

“Yeah, I have no problem with it. All I need you to do is repeat what you told me to the court. If Ray being there makes you feel comfortable, go for it.” Cheryl nodded and then left the kitchen. There was really nothing else to examine in the kitchen, so it only made sense for her to finally question Lotti. Fallz started to make her way to Lotti’s room. There stood King playing with a new set of knives. They had to be the ones that were promised to him. When King noticed her, he smirked. 

“Looking forward to that axe,” he said as he stepped aside. 

“You’ll get your axe as promised. Do me a favor and let Ryan know that we’re about ready to start the trial?” King nodded and took out his phone as Fallz walked into the room only to barely dodge something being thrown at her. 

“Whoa, Lotti, it’s me!” she said when she realized said thing was the axe the Scot got for her birthday. 

“You were the one who trapped me in my own room! I can defend myself on my own!” 

“Yeah, but you all were having a screaming match at 12:45 PM! Half the MadHouse is either still asleep or playing video games by then! Besides, with the way you guys were going at it, nothing was going to get resolved. So, let’s get this over and prove your innocence.” Lotti sighed and pulled her axe out of the wall. 

“Like I told the others, I didn’t do it. I haven’t been in the kitchen all day.” 

“Jess saw you at 11:30 going to your room with a Diet Coke can.” 

“That’s impossible. I’ve been playing video games with Joe since 10. I took a break at 11:25 to go to the bathroom and I came back at 11:30.” Fallz nodded. 

“Alright that makes sense. That matched up with the time frame. That proves you weren’t in the kitchen along with Cheryl’s testimony. We’ve got this in the bag.” 

“Don’t be too sure about that,” Omega said from the doorway. Fallz jumped. 

“Hey, no eavesdropping. That’s cheating.” 

“I promise I only heard your last sentence. The truth will come out and Lotti will be proven guilty.” 

“Save the trash talk for the courtroom. I will show you that Lotti is innocent.” 

=======================

Given the MadHouse didn’t have a court room, they used the next best thing. The dungeon. They brought down a few tables to make it look more like a courtroom and even gave Ryan a mallet. Fallz knew they were going to regret that later. Ryan sat behind the bigger table while Fallz and Omega stood behind two smaller ones on opposite sides of the room. 

“Okay, are you two ready to start this trial of yours?” Ryan asked as he looked at the two. 

“The Defense is ready your honor,” Fallz said. 

“Your Honor?” 

“Well, you are the judge Ryan,” King said. 

“How about your majesty instead?” Fallz sighed. Anything to get this over with.

“Yes, your majesty. The defense is ready.” 

“The prosecution is also ready your majesty.” 

“Alright then. Please review the case for us, Omega.” 

“Of course, your majesty. At approximately 12:00 PM today, an empty diet coke can was found in the fridge in the kitchen of the MadHouse. Thanks to various witness statements, it is clear that Lotti was the one to empty it.” 

“Objection! Your majesty there is a large amount of evidence that proves my client’s innocence and shows she couldn’t have been the one to have drunk the diet coke,” Fallz said as a counter. Ryan rose a brow at her. She was getting into this. All those hours of Phoenix Wright weren’t for nothing. 

“We’ll see what the evidence tells us. Prosecution, you may call out your first witness,” Ryan said. 

“The prosecution calls Jess to the stand.” King opened the door to the dungeon and allowed Jess to walk inside. The weapon keeper sat in a chair in the middle of the room and King held out an axe to her. 

“Do you swear to tell the truth or may I strike you down?” 

“I swear. Where’d you get that axe?” King just chuckled and walked away. Omega cleared his throat. 

“Jess, we understand that you saw Lotti returning to her room with a diet coke can at 11:30, am I correct?” he asked. 

“Yes, that’s correct.” 

“And she’s the only one who you saw with a diet coke can today correct?” 

“Yeah, there was only one left in the fridge all day.” 

“No further questions,” Omega said with a smug face. Fallz rolled her eyes. 

“Do you have any objections Fallz?” 

“Yes, I do. You see it’s impossible for Lotti to have gotten the diet coke can, your majesty. Lotti had left her room for a bathroom break while gaming with Joe around 11:25. She left the bathroom at 11:300. Therefore, she was nowhere near the kitchen. How is it that the witness saw her with a diet coke can if the defendant never went to the kitchen?” 

“Objection! Jess clearly saw the defendant with the can!” 

“Objection! But the time tables don’t match up. Lotti could have had an old can in her room and left with it. That could have been the can Jess saw.” 

“Objection! I have a witness that says otherwise. I’d like to call Joe to the stand.” Fallz blinked. Joe? What the hell could he know? King allowed Joe in as Jess stood aside. He sat in the chair and King swore him in. “Joe, would you please tell the court what Lotti told you when she left for her break?” Joe smirked. 

“Yeah, after she blew up five of my worms, she said she was going to go get a diet coke and then left the room.” 

“What?!” Fallz yelled and Ryan smacked the mallet down. 

“Order.” 

“Yeah, and at 11:30 she came back with a can. There was no can already in her room.” Omega chuckled. 

“That is all your majesty.” 

“Objection! Lotti was never in the kitchen! How the heck did she get the diet coke can?!” 

“I wouldn’t be surprised if she lied about not going in the kitchen,” Omega taunted. 

“Objection! The defense will like to call Cheryl and Ray to the stand!” 

Cheryl and Ray walked into the room. As King swore them in, Ray couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“I’m already dead, dude, but if you can make my BFF a ghost like me that’ll be awesome!” he said. King grinned, but knew he couldn’t do anything unless someone was lying. He stepped aside and allowed the trial to continue. 

“Cheryl, you were in the kitchen during the time frame correct?” 

“Yes, I was getting oreos for me and Ray.” 

“At any point did Lotti enter the kitchen?” 

“Nope, only me and Tabi were there.” It was Fallz’s turn to give off a smug grin. 

“No further questions, your majesty.” 

“Your majesty, this doesn’t explain how she got the diet coke can in the first place,” Omega stated, “Until we know where she got it from, she cannot be excused from this case.” 

“She probably got it from the closet next to the bathroom,” Ray suddenly said. 

“What?” Omega and Fallz said at the same time. 

“Yeah, Lotti over there is SUPER protective of it. She has to be hiding something in there. I thought it was more oreos. I was gonna steal some for me and my BFF, you know?” 

“The Prosecution calls the defendant to the stand!” Fallz cursed. She wanted to solve this without Lotti taking the stand, but they needed to know where she got the diet coke from. Lotti walked into the room and swore in. Omega cut right to the chase. 

“Alright, Lotti, we know you had a diet coke in your hand when you went back to your room at 11:30. So, let’s skip the roundabout and you tell us about the closet.” 

“I have nothing to hide in the closet. I don’t know what Ray is talking about. Why would I be protective of a closet for crying out loud?” 

“Then how did you get the diet coke?” 

“I told you I didn’t have any!” 

“The evidence doesn’t lie. Might as well be straight with us. Are you hiding diet coke in the closet?” 

“How would I even be able to do that? Ryan has a crazy diet coke sixth sense. Tabi proved it’s impossible to hide it from him.” 

Fallz hummed in thought. I was impossible to hide diet coke from Ryan....unless...

“The defense will like to call Azriella to the stand,” she said suddenly. Ryan and Omega looked confused, but Lotti paled. 

“Fallz...” she whispered. 

“I need to prove your innocence Lotti. The only way to do that is to figure out the truth.” Azriella came in and swore in. She blinked in confusion. 

“Um, what am I doing here? Am I in trouble for something?” she asked. 

“No, Azriella, I just wanna ask one question. Have you done any favors for Lotti recently?” Fallz asked carefully and Azriella nodded. 

“Yeah, she asked for a favor a few days ago, why?” Fallz sighed. 

“Lotti, in any other circumstance, I would call you a genius. Do you wanna tell them or should I?” Lotti groaned. 

“Fine, Jess did see me with a diet coke, but not from the kitchen. I have a whole hidden stash of diet coke in the closet not far from the bathroom. I had Azriella Ryan proof it for me so I didn’t have to worry about him finding it. I just had to keep everyone else out.” Ryan’s rose a brow. 

“So you’re saying I didn’t have to go to the store to get more diet coke? We’re going to talk about that later,” he said and Lotti groaned. Fallz gave a sad smile. 

“Sorry, Lotti, but I had to in order to clear your name.” 

“Who said we’re done,” Omega said. 

“What do you mean? Everything checks out.” Omega tsked. Fallz was going to kill him one day.

“Oh, Fallz, we still don’t know who took it. Now that we know Azriella as involved, Lotti could have asked for another favor to turn into a ghost temporarily and become invisible in order to grab the coke from the fridge without being seen.” 

“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!” 

“Unless you have evidence to prove me wrong, she’s still a suspect!” Fallz groaned. There had to be something to prove Omega wrong. Something she was forgetting. She blinked in realization. 

“The can!” she shouted and Ryan brought down his mallet again. Fallz calmed down a little. “The can was found empty IN THE FRIDGE! In order for the prosecution’s theory to happen, Lotti would have had to go back to the kitchen to put it back.” 

“And who says she didn’t?” 

“Joe?” Joe shook his head. 

“She couldn’t have. Lotti was still playing games with me by the time the can was found,” he said. 

“So, Lotti did get the can from her secret stash.”

“Then who took the can then?!” Omega yelled and Ryan hit the mallet again. Fallz honestly didn’t have an answer. There were only two people in the kitchen during that time. Cheryl and....

“I’d like to call Tabi to the stand,” she said slowly. King ran off to get the TabiKat and Omega looked at her in confusion. 

“Fallz....” 

“We might have our time of the crime mixed up,” she said as Tabi walked in with an innocent smile. Fallz didn’t trust it at all. King swore her in and Fallz began her attack. 

“Tabi, you were in the kitchen with Cheryl earlier right?” she asked 

“Yeah, we were talking about the latest cosplay I was working on.” 

“How long were you in the kitchen?” 

“About an hour. Is this going anywhere? I do have to finish this cosplay.” 

“When did you leave?” 

“11:35.” 

“That means you were there alone at 10:35. So between 10:35 and 11:15, you had the chance to grab the last diet coke.” 

“Objection! Your majesty, the witness doesn’t even like diet coke. She prefers Snapple Apple or Pepsi.” 

“Objection! Who said anything about her drinking it?” 

“What?” 

“There’s more uses for a can than to drink out of it. I say she needed the can for her cosplay and emptied it in order to use it since the MadHouse drinks diet coke like water. She put it back in the fridge so no one would be the wiser until she needed it for the cosplay.” 

“Objection!” Tabi suddenly yelled and Ryan blinked in confusion. 

“Uh, can she do that?” he asked. 

“We’re going by Phoenix Wright rules; of course she can,” Fallz informed him. Tabi continued to give an innocent smile as she tilted her head to the side. 

“You don’t have any evidence that connects me to the can. Who knows? Maybe Lotti asked Azriella for more than two favors. She is a witch and can do many amazing things. Just provide the snacks and Azriella can help you out with your problems. I’m completely innocent in all of this. 

“Objection! That’s where you’re wrong,” Fallz said suddenly. The smile twitched. 

“What?” 

“Tabi, please show us your hands.” 

“My hands? Okay...” Tabi showed the court her hands and they were covered with pink glitter. 

“Your cosplay involves pink glitter correct?” 

“Yes, I need it for...Oh no...” 

“Oh yes. On the can in question, there are specks of pink glitter on its surface. Pretty sure Lotti doesn’t own any glitter and isn’t working on a cosplay involving glitter. Neither is anyone else in the MadHouse besides you. That glitter on the can is as good as any fingerprint.” 

All was quiet for a while until Tabi started laughed. She clapped her hands and looked at Fallz with that innocent smile. 

“Well done, Fallz. I admit defeat this time. Something told me you'd get around my bribe to King. However...” The innocent face turned into an evil glare. Fallz felt her soul slightly go cold. Just slightly. “Next time won’t be so easy,” she said darkly only to return to smiling with that familiar innocence. Fallz still couldn’t tell how the girl could switch between the two so easily. Guess those acting skills came in handy. Ryan cleared his throat. 

“Very well. Thanks to the evidence provided by both the defense and the prosecution, I find the defendant, Lotti, Not Guilty.” Ryan brought down the mallet one more time and ended the trial. Fallz gave a sigh of relief. Lotti punched her arm. 

“Ow! I just proved your innocence and you punch me.” 

“And I appreciate it very much. But I still lost my secret stash of diet coke because of you,” she said. 

“Speaking of which, Lotti, come here,” Ryan said authoritatively and Lotti groaned as she walked to the Mad King. Omega soon walked up to Fallz. 

“Not bad. Nice job thinking on your feet there,” he said and Fallz shrugged and smiled. 

“This house is crazy, but it doesn’t take long to connect the dots.” 

“I guess. Still doesn’t mean you can beat Phoenix Wright without cheating.” Fallz pouted. 

“I’ll show you! I almost beat the third trial before all of this!” she yelled and marched back to her room. Time to go on as usual. Finally.


End file.
